reader Heidi (i hope she doesn’t mind) emailed me and said that she has finished her chemotherapy, and the doctors are delivering her “miracle baby” this Saturday!

that’s fantastic. God bless you and your baby!

i usually don’t blog the results show, but …

ok, all three songs that we have to choose from for this Red Cross cd thingy… they’re all awful.

the Ford commercial with the puppets… huh?

Nadia shouldn’t be bottom 3. Jessica probably should, based on last night’s performance… and i agree with Simon, Nadia should be on the couch and Scott on the stage… but i didn’t vote, so ya know… i can’t gripe, right?

Randy and Paula so wussy when Ryan puts them on the spot…

i’d say that out of the bottom 3, Jessica should go home, but i’d have kept her over Scott for sure.

yeah yeah, day late, blah blah blah. we were having dinner with Dave in Texas last night, so we’re watching AI on the DVR (more on dinner later)…

Bo - i totally love the outfit. ok, it was great, because it was Bo and he’s just that good, but it was not as awesome as he normally is. oh, and a punny guy. haha.

Jessica - i don’t think that was such a good key change. and the song was pretty boring, definitely didn’t showcase her voice. she looked good, though.

Anwar - pitchy. i don’t understand! i want Anwar back! this was not good until the end. :-(

Nadia - soooo much better than last week. and i love Bonnie Raitt, so doubly good.

Constantine - yeah, he was really good, and true, even better than Bo. now if we can just get him to quit molesting that camera…

Nikko - ok, he almost won me over at the very beginning of the song with those ‘NSYNC moves, because we all know i adore ‘NSYNC. no, that’s not a joke, if you’re new to this blog, it’s the truth. that aside, he was pretty good tonight. vocally, better than Anwar, and i’m so glad he didn’t “i want to sex you up” us.

Anthony - i have to say Simon was wrong on him last night. Anthony was finally close-to-awesome again. i like him without the glasses, and he finally picked a song that showcased him. i clapped for real.

Carrie - she is wonderful. she sings Martina so much better than me. i will buy any cd she releases.

Scott - the pencil smudge mustache is killing me. great voice. significantly better than he’s been, and not nearly as lazy as he’s been! no Ruben last night! hooray!

seriously. what is Paula on lately?

Vonzell - outstanding. she has been far underrated on this show, and now she shows why.

two things:

1. i got this email from a reader earlier [non-ALIAS-related portions deleted]. go buy his barbecue sauce.

1. I am upset with you. Because of your blog I have now netflixed the first two seasons of Alias, taking precious time away from my family, whom I love.

2. I am further upset with you because I finished season two last night and the TWO MISSING YEARS kept me up until 4am last night tossing. So yes, I am somewhat grumpy.

3. And lastly I am declaring jihad on you and your pinky toe because my wife had put her foot down and I had to let more of “her” movies through, meaning I won’t see the beginning of Season 3 until Saturday at the earliest. Forcing me to suffer endlessly

Woe is me.

poor thing.

2. oh, and this is a spoiler, big big spoiler that even i haven’t predicted yet in my many many predictions that i throw out every Wednesday night when Frank & i watch ALIAS together. i have been spoiler-free since i started blogging about ALIAS because i think i snark funnier that way. anyway, i had no choice but to see the spoiler, as a reader emailed me and said to go to a certain place on the internet and read a certain thing and i would be happy… which made me predict what his spoiler would be… which made me go check this certain place on the internet to see if i was correct, because i always have to know if i’m right…. so anyway, LAURA, if you want a great great spoiler that you will bounce around over… go here and scroll down to TV!!

3. i know i said there were 2 things. i don’t care.

4. i’m presently snarking 4.9, and i’m almost finished, just have to write the last scene. tomorrow. i promise. i don’t promise what time tomorrow.

so a lot of kids are getting really sick and even dying from some e. coli bacteria they apparently picked up at Florida petting zoos. very sad.

Frank and i went to the zoo recently.

therefore, my Bikermommy sends me at least one FoxNews article per day about petting zoo illnesses and then tells me how careful i need to be if i go to the zoo.

MESSAGE TO BIKERMOMMY: i used the alcohol-laden anti-bacterial gel after i petted the one deer i petted at the zoo. and i didn’t let any of the animals lick me. also, i think the petting zoos in question were fairs. we went to the real, bona fide Brevard Zoo.

oh, and i am agonizingly sorrowful over the fact that i forgot to make Frank’s coffee this morning.

last week, we all gathered in the conference room at work for lunch. Jen was grilling our new intern about her dating life, whether she wanted to be fixed up with someone, typical nosy girl stuff. later, in the kitchen, we moved our attention to one of the guys in the office…

J: i think we should fix Guy H up with someone.
GUY H: ok, i’m going to be travelling all the time, i don’t have time to go meet girls.
SARAHK: Guy H, you should try blogging. meet girls on the internet. worked for Frank.
Y: ok, would ya stop with the internet stuff? ’cause that’s just creepy.
SARAHK: haaaaaayyyyyy!

worked for me…

Sydney’s a daddy’s girl. probably because he lets her get away with everything.

(more…)

it was just perfect.

i’ve been a little stressed, because it’s tax season. happy, but still stressed and ready for it to be over. my sweet boyfriend told me sometime during the week that if i had Saturday off, we could spend the day together and do whatever i wanted to do and then he wanted to take me out for a nice dinner. and i worked enough during the week that i could take off Saturday and work Sunday.

we had decided to go hiking and were getting ready to go when we discovered our flea infestation problem, and that it was a bad problem. so all daytime plans were off, as we had to figure out what to do for the kitties and what to do for SarahK, who has the sweetest blood that is beloved by all the fleas. but Frank was still planning to take me to dinner and then Easter Vigil at his church. we didn’t know for sure whether those plans were on until after we got the girls some relief. we got some liquid to put on their backs and gave them pills from the vet, and about a half hour later, they were agonizing and freaking out. we were worried for a while, but then around 3:00, they calmed down some.

Frank told me that he’d heard that the Chart House was a nice restaurant, and he wanted to treat me to a nice dinner. i said, “wow, i heard that one is really nice and that they have really good food. and that it’s really expensive.” “oh really? how expensive?” “i don’t know, i just know it’s supposed to be one of the best in Melbourne.” he said, “well, you’ve been pretty stressed out, and you deserve a nice dinner.” he told me he heard he should make reservations, so he said he was going to go make those. he went into his bedroom. when he came out, the sneaky fella said he made the reservations for 5:45 so we would have plenty of time to get there after mass. i told him he’d better call the church and make sure mass was at 4. he went back to his room and did that, and said that it was at 8, so we’d have plenty of time for dinner.

what the sneaky prince was really doing was calling his voice mail at work and talking for no reason. he had made the reservations on Wednesday, but he did actually call the church when i told him to.

we got ready to go, and i had no clue what to wear. i hadn’t gone “Easter” dress shopping, so we’d stopped at a couple of stores on the way back from the vet, but i’d had no luck. finally i remembered my cute purple dress in the back of my closet that i never wear because it’s a little snug. i put it on, and Frank said it was cute, so i wore it. the great Frank J. even wore a tie. of course, that was a little production, because he didn’t know how to tie a tie, and i thought i knew, but neither of us did. that’s ok, because there are websites that describe the process (with diagrams!).

as we were driving to the restaurant, Toby Keith was playing (Greatest Hits, Vol. 2), and “Courtesy of the Red, White and Blue” came on. Frank never skips that song, but suddenly he reached for the cd player and said, “let’s skip that one and sing this one so we can sing together.” he fast-forwarded to “Mockingbird”, the duet based on the old nursery rhyme. we always sing this one together in the car, and we get really into it. so into the song, in fact, that Frank has injured himself while singing it before. anyway, we sang Mockingbird. go read the lyrics if you don’t know the nursery rhyme.

we got to the restaurant and valet-parked, and i came around the back of the car to go around to Frank’s side, which was closest to the door. Frank came around and met me at the back and said, “oh, don’t look, sweetie, i have a little gift for you that i need to get out of the car.” i walked near the door and tried not to look. in the process of my trying not to look, i saw him carrying a green velvet necklace box. whee!

we got inside, and Frank gave them our name. well, his name. but soon to be our name! :-D the girls at the front exchanged glances and looked at me and smiled really big and said “oooohhhhhh, Fleming…” “we have a lovely table prepared for you over here, wink-wink, nudge-nudge.” of course, i’m still thinking, wow, i’m getting a necklace! i hope it’s long enough that i don’t fee like it’s choking me when i wear it! and i said, “when did you have time to go get me a gift?”

Frank the Dishonest said, “i had last Friday off” or something like that, and SarahK the Enchanted said, “ooooh. ok.” as it turns out, Monday night when he was making me worry, he was buying my ring. and knowing that i must be worrying, he actually left before they were done re-sizing the ring, because my finger is so tiny that it was going to take an extra half hour. Monday night when he got home, he did say to me, “i’m sorry i made you worry. i promise to make it up to you so you’ll say, ‘wow, i’m somewhat less enraged by this incident’.” Tuesday at lunchtime, he went and picked up the ring. oh, and he’s known at the jewelry store as “the guy with the ring”.

the hostess took us to our table, which was by the window overlooking the boats and the Indian River. when we arrived at the table, the hostess said, “oh, and what beautiful flowers.” i started oohing and awwing and getting a little misty-eyed. the arrangement of stargazers on the table was absolutely gorgeous.

(more…)

we took some less blurry pictures. the story will be up later, but we need a nap. so sleepy.
btw, if you’re a chick and curious about the specs on the ring, here they are:
color - uhhhh - all the colors of the rainbow! it’s so sparkly!
clarity - stinkin’ clear.
cut - brilliant, obviously.
carat - stinkin’ huge.
oh, and the metal is white gold, which is exactly what i wanted.
and the fiance is the great Frank J (worship him!), which is exactly what i wanted.

(more…)

details to follow…

(more…)

Minerva and Sydney both have fleas. suggestions on how to get rid of those?

well, not my first gator… but i went to Celebration (the town that Disney built) today for a client meeting, and on the way back, Yvonne pointed out something in the pond beside the road, and i said, “what? the duck?” and then i spotted the long reptile slithering through the pond. my first non-zoo gator! it was kinda cool.

the AI revote… we forgot to vote last night (too busy playing donkey konga), so the repeat tonight is fine because we get another chance to vote for Carrie and Bo. and Paula is doubly annoying tonight. and last night she was ridiculous, so i didn’t know it could be more annoying. oh, and what? Nikko was the best of last night? i don’t think so, Tim.

my finger bruise… big ugly bruise on my finger today from where i busted it last night playing that game… so if Frank beats me at all tonight, i’ve already got an excuse.

my hands hurt. and i think i have a few broken blood vessels. Frank got this Donkey Konga game and some other game that came with bongos, so we just played together. Donkey Konga for about an hour. and my hands hurt, ouchie.

but that was fun. and any of you ladies out there who want to get a good workout for your arms… i’m sweating pretty well, and my arms are tired. so i recommend it. it’s fun too.

btw, i won most of the Battle competition. if i can hang with him till the roll competition at the end, it’s in the bag for me. i didn’t make All-City symphonic band 2nd chair mallets for 3 years in high school for nuthin’! woohoo!

we’re watching CSI Miami from last night.
lemme back up. last night, Frank was getting ready to go to bed, but i wanted to watch CSI Miami. he told me no, wait for him so we can watch it together (which i really prefer, we have so much fun watching the dufus box together). so i said, can we please at least watch the opening sequence and see if Horatio does the sunglasses thing? please please please?

so we did, and Horatio did, and i squealed with glee! “then this accident… [sunglasses on]… was no … accident… at all.” drums and music and … “we don’t get fooled again…. we don’t get fooled again!!!… no no! no no!” do de do do do de do do… bededenh bededenh bededuuunnnnhhhhhh.

and tonight we’re watching the whole thing, and it’s just grand.

one issue i take with the writers, though. part of the storyline has to do with soda that’s made with pure cane sugar. one of the CSIs said that soft drinks are only made with pure cane sugar in Mexico. * sigh * in Dublin, TX, they still make “Dublin Dr. Pepper”, which is, you guessed it, Dr. Pepper made with … pure…. cane… sugar. i can accept that a lot of the science they give us is probably inexact, but start talking about something from Texas and get that wrong? that’s a cryin’ shame, i tell ya.

the Billboard #1 hits

01 Anthony - it was fine. his pants didn’t fit, though, and that bothered me. it’s not like they were baggy on purpose, they were baggy in the wrong places and snug in other places, it was just weird for me. that’s all, i couldn’t get over the pants enough to get into the voice. it was a’ight, i guess.

02 Carrie - wow, she actually gave me chills at the end. ok, we heard the reviews before we DVR’d back, so i was expecting something amazing. it was pretty stinking great, but not as great as the reviews suggested. but bravo, i knew she was one of my favorites for a reason. one more thing. her forehead is way too big for her to wear her hair all teased back in 80s (i need a new noun…) beatsarahdownness. she needs bangs, or if she’s like me and can’t stand to have bangs, she needs her hair around her face. period. no forehead show.

03 Scott - it was better than he’s been but i’m still waiting for him to stop being lazy. Ruben. yawn. i’m tired of saying it.

04 Bo - he was very calm, and still so great. he’s just born to do this, and i clapped when i heard what song he picked, my Uncle Robert sang it at karaoke once to my Crazy Aunt Wanda and i’ve loved it ever since. loved the outfit, especially how the jeans looked like the tops of cowboy boots at the bottom. anyway. i heart Bo. go Bo!

05 Nikko - he is too Marvin Gaye meets Bobby Brown for me. he’s all “let’s have sex” and “it’s my prerogative”. yuck.

06 Vonzell - i hate hate hate the skorts. if that’s a trend coming back, i’m crawling into a hole and not coming out until it’s over. SKORTS. PLEASE. anyway. Vonzell was really good, i’m glad she was on tonight.

i think Paula and her hubby need a conjugal visit. she’s getting way too friendly with Simon tonight. i half expect to see tongues.

07 Constantine - i actually enjoyed it. but then again, i was in the kitchen checking the chicken and didn’t have to watch him molest the camera with his eyes. thank goodness for that, because if he was singing “i think i love you”, then i can just imagine an overzealous cocker spaniel with a brand new mailman. sorry for the visual.

08 Nadia - forced, boring. but she went full Cyndi Lauper for it with the mohawk, it was good because it was Nadia. but blah.

09 Mikalah - not so good.

Paula is on my last nerve tonight. she’s dancing like a dance core girl and — i’m sorry, but didn’t she have her chance to talk? Simon should get to talk first so the one person who actually has something to say gets his two cents in. Paula says nothing more than rah rah unless Randy says it was a’ight, and then she gets all serious and says i still believe in you. gimme a break.

10 Anwar - i was bored in the beginning but later in the song it was good.

11 Jessica - yay! no boobs! and she was great but i was expecting a lot more from that Bonnie Tyler classic. i wanted big exciting things! but she was great.

Frank worked late tonight and made me worry. didn’t answer any of his phones, didn’t call me, and by 7:30, i was really unsettled.

later this evening…

FRANK J: i’m sorry i made you worry, sweetie.
SARAHK: i’m sorry i’m taking advantage of it.

:-D

i bought earphones at Target Friday so i can play relaxing celtic music in my ears at work. the box said “also for iPod.”

ok, whatever, it has the right plug thingy, so i got them.

the cord for the right earpiece is twice as long as the one for the left earpiece. i’m not sure what this is about but i do remember that those funky iPod commercials before Christmas always showed the animated teenager with the cord drooping around his neck like this does. maybe it has to do with the fact that you never wear your mp3 player in the center of your body but rather on an arm or clipped to the side of your clothes or stuffed in a pocket. ? maybe? ok, but that would force me to wear it on my left side, right? what if i want the mp3 player on my right side?

no, i wouldn’t wear it on my right side. it’s true. i’d want it on my left side so i could push the buttons with my right hand.

ok, nevermind, move along, nothing to see here. just needed to work that out for myself. and if you’ve been wondering the same thing, you now have my theory, useless as it may be.

but wait!!! if i have it in my pocket, i want to reach into my pocket with my right hand if i want to push the buttons… wait, no, still left hand, because then i can hold it in my left hand and push the buttons with my right hand.

so there’s only one more question. what about the southpaws?

The Incredibles came out on DVD March 15, and in celebration of it being the Ides of March, actually in celebration of it being only one month till the end of tax season, Frank bought me the DVD.

Friday night i picked up sushi and we watched my new DVD with the director commentary.

Saturday morning i got up and came into the livingroom and turned on disc 1 of my new Tina Turner cd. haha. i blared Proud Mary from the stereo and made Frank his coffee. he says i make it better than he does, but then again, he simply said, “yes, you do, sweetie,” after i asked, “do i make your coffee better than you make it?” like he was going to say no. anyway, that got Frank up. of course, i did hear screams from his room, so i’m assuming that Sydney clawing the back of his head had something to do with him waking up too. or maybe it was the fluffy cat crushing his chest. hee, cats are the greatest.

i clipped three of Stupid Monkey Purr-Purr’s claws before she made her escape. i’ll get her again soon! * shakes fist *

we sat in the livingroom and laughed our heads off. played Proud Mary at least twice, and Frank tried to tell me that it’s about drugs. maybe so, it was written by Fogerty, but i prefer to think it’s about riverboats. :-) we played more songs and laughed and laughed. Frank does so many little things that make me laugh so hard, he always have his comedy switched to “on”, you know? whether it’s pretending to be rolling joints during Proud Mary, or changing the words to The Best … “you’re simply pretty good… better than most of the rest… better than a lot of people…” stuff like that.

i told Frank, “i could make you breakfast. or i could bring you your donuts.” guess which? yeah, i didn’t feel like making eggs. so he ate his chocolate donuts while i ate pecan sandies and drank that sweet goodness that is Coca-Cola.

we both had showers and then went to the zoo. having grown up with the Fort Worth Zoo, which is usually ranked around #2 in the U.S., i didn’t know what to think about the Brevard Zoo. i knew not to expect the zoo i was used to, so i had very low expectations. it was actually better than i expected. different, too, though.

i asked Frank, “where are the zebras? lion? tiger? monkey house?” they don’t have those. that’s ok. they have their monkeys randomly scattered throughout the zoo, in the different “continents” - it’s set up like Animal Kingdom by continent. you actually can kayak around a large portion of the zoo, but we didn’t feel like doing that this time. anyway, back to monkeys. they had black howler monkeys, but the female was blonde, which confused us. they also had a big cage of spider monkeys, and Frank was holding a palm leaf, and one of the monkeys came up and snatched the leaf right out of Frank’s hand with its tail (which looked like an elephant snout without the nostrils). poor Frank, it nearly killed him. he kept telling me all these things about monkeys, and i asked, “why do you know so much about monkeys? they’re evil!” and he replied with a simple “Know Thy Enemy.” haha. he sure was drawn to the monkey cages. that reminds me. they didn’t have elephants.

the Brevard Zoo does have a lot more alligators than the FWZoo. i wonder why that is? ;-) they had one lonesome crocodile, and later Frank had to research the differences between crocs and gators; he’s so cute.

Frank petted a giraffe, or maybe he was teaching it to box; anyway, the giraffe wouldn’t put up its dukes to defend itself.

the Brevard Zoo had 2 white rhinos, but we were mad because they were red from rolling in the mud all day. if we’re paying $9 a pop, we want clean rhinos!

there wasn’t a herpetarium, and i felt smart when i asked Frank if they have a herpetarium. “a what?” “a snakehouse, sweetie.” i love knowing words that he doesn’t, it’s so rare, you know. we tried to go see the sea otter. they have this big expensive sea otter exhibit, and the ONE sea otter they have wasn’t even out. after they built him this really fancy house! the nerve. we quit looking after a while when Frank said, “we can not look at otters at home.”

what else. they had a jaguar and a couple of bobcats.

oh yes, the bird. they had this parrot, and we walked up and were talking to each other, and i said, “oh, that yellow bird is so pretty!” and the green parrot said, “what. ever.” and i started giggling, and the parrot started giggling to imitate me, and that just made me laugh harder. we stayed there a while.

they had these tapirs. and one of them was making really funky noises, and the other was following it. i told Frank they were going to mate. but then they walked off, and one came back alone. i told him she must not have been in the mood, and Frank called me a cutie-head. that might have been because i thought they were anteaters, though.

the sloth was not there. it’s not like it coulda run away. what was up with that?

they had a free flight aviary, where the birds landed on people and tried to eat their glasses. included in there was a neat butterfly fly-zone. i’m afraid of butterflies, and Frank only saw one Monarch, but it was a good exhibit anyway.

the zoo was fun. it took a couple of hours.

we went to Outback for dinner, and i got the same thing i always get. the Brisbane Caesar salad w/ shrimp on the barbie. Outback has, hands-down, the best Caesar dressing i’ve ever had. it’s wonderful, and i moan a lot when i have it. Frank was getting annoyed. “if i hear one more time how wonderful the salad is… i’m gonna sit here and keep eating my steak!”

then we came back and watched the extras from The Incredibles DVD and caught up on some of our CSIs and played Wahoo!

Sunday morning was worship, then i worked all day. i’m still not sure about this congregation we’ve been visiting. i sooo want it to be like the one back home… but i’m not going to find it…

that’s all for now. sorry about the light posting, i’m just so tired when i get home from work these days. i know it will let up soon. ta!

i haven’t been to Super Target in a long time. Amarillo didn’t have one (lousy un-super Target). when i was in Fort Worth at Christmas, i was boycotting ST because they stopped letting the Salvation Army stand outside their stores because they caved to the idiots of the ACLU, not wanting to “offend non-Christians”. don’t get me started. anyway, i’ve not had time to go to one since moving to Florida. until today.

wow, did that sound awful dramatic for a trip to Super Target? that’s because we’re watching CSI Miami, and everything Horatio says is super-dramatic.

so i had a horrifically splitting headache (non-migraine) today, and i had to get out of the office, as it was particularly noisy today. so i went to Super Target. and whee, it was fun!! knowing that tomorrow is payday, i had a ridiculously hard time restraining my purchasing whims. here’s what i got…

essay, you know those cutesie Mossimo joggy suit outfit thingies we always want? yeah, i got one, and it’s way cute. funky blue and that almost neony lime green color that i would never wear because it scares me. anyway, i got the little tank top thingy with built-in sports bra, the pants, and the zippy jacket. i’m wearing it right now, because i couldn’t wait to put it on. hee!

needed more of those disposable kitchen storage containers (really, i’m such a slob and never clean out the refrigerator that it’s just best to go all disposable), so i got some of those.

lunch. spaghettios with meatballs.

i tried tried tried to avoid the music and movies section. even turned toward it and back away from it twice. then i stopped paying attention for half a second, and my cart just dragged me over there. i needed music. new music. good music. rock music. and country music. i knew exactly what i needed. toby. tina. avril. so i picked up Avril’s latest, Tina Turner’s All the Best 2 disc fabulous collection of greatest hits, and Toby Keith’s Greatest Hits (vol. 1). smokin’.

on my way out of that section, i just happened upon Drumline on DVD on sale for $10, and i totally dig that movie and had been waiting for it to go on sale for $10 for a long time.

ohhhhh, one other thing about Super Target. it was like being home. it’s true what we say, everything is bigger in Texas. shopping at Publix, i’ve been with all regular size stuff, and it’s made me feel kinda small. or big. or super-sized (which is another reason for the joggy suit). so walking through Super Target, with the packages of 12 rolls of paper towels, the 24-packs of toilet paper, 15 pounds of ground beef, 6 packs of panties. it was nice.

oh, so on the way home tonight, i popped in Tina. danced my lily white pinkytoe all the way down the interstate. who knew you could get a good workout driving?

UPDATE: bad segue… Cal at Football Fans for Truth has an article about FFFT’s doing affiliate advertising rather than blogads. i’d be interested to see how that turns out. and apparently, Target has a 10% website-wide sale going on. evil Target!

he just came out of the bathroom and i noticed that he was fastening his belt.

SARAHK: why are you putting your belt on? it’s 9 p.m., you’re in for the evening.
FRANK: i went to the bathroom, now i’m putting my belt back on. wow, she really is a cutie head.
SARAHK: why do you need your belt? you’re at home, goofy goof. seriously. would you like me to get you a necktie?
FRANK: it holds my Leatherman. i might need that.
SARAHK: are you going to need to defend yourself? d’oh! it’s a multi-purpose tool, not a weapon! stupid! stupid! stupid!
FRANK: it’s not a defense weapon, sweetie. i’m dating Jessica Simpson. except without all the boobs and lips.
SARAHK: are you going to need to take something apart? divert attention! make him forget you called it a weapon!
FRANK: i used it to open my Guinness. and you shut up!
SARAHK: are you gonna have another beer? beer bad! beer evil!
FRANK: i am if you keep nagging! buuuuuuuuuurrrrrnnnn!

so Mario is gone. that makes me sad. Nikko is back. that makes me indifferent.

Jessica 01 - she bores me. and annoys me. but she has a great voice. and i would like to wholeheartedly thank her for showing a lot less boob this week. snaps.

Anwar 02 - i sigh. every time he’s through singing, i sigh. i thought he was exquisite.

Mikalah 03 - i thought she was pretty good. needs to work on mic control but she was cute anyway.

Constantine 04 - he started off awful, especially with all of the self-love, which just. makes. me. want. to. barf. the beginning was hideous, but ya know, dawg, he really pulled it together in the end. and i’d agree, it was his best since the voting rounds started. but he’s wearing too much makeup. stop smiling, stop flirting with the cameraman, and please sir, stop the bedroom eyes. blech.

Lindsay 05 - that was more exciting than she’s been in a long time. she wasn’t bad.

Anthony 06 - his song choices beat me down further every week. he’s one of the great wailers in this top 12, but about a tenth as exciting and original as Anwar, who beats him on all counts. he’s starting to bore me, and i’ve been a fan from the beginning. ouchie, way off key for the last sixth of the song.

Nadia 07 - she’s one of the best, hands down. i’ve wondered if she could slow it down and still be outstanding. now i know. bravo. and a great horrible metaphor from Simon. a steak, indeed.

Bo 08 - he and Nadia should get married and have fabulous rocker babies. vote for Bo!!!

Vonzell 09 - i thought she was really good. that last note was a tinge flat, but she put on a great performance. i love the dress. and i was finishing Simon’s sentence as soon as he started it. she’s been perfectly in the middle every week. so she’s safe for now, but yeah, she needs to notch it up and kick some pinkytoe.

Scott 10 - i want to see him succeed. i really do. because i want him to take his singing contract and shove it down dear ol’ dad’s throat. but he bores me as much as Ruben Studdard did the last 5 weeks of Clay’s season. oh my goodness. am i watching a different show than the judges? for me it was a snoozer.

Carrie 11 - her stage presence isn’t the best, but she’s got one of the best voices. i love country music. i did have to laugh, though, when she said she was doing an Everly Brothers song. no no. any girl who grew up listening to Texas radio knows that she was doing Linda Ronstadt. *giggle*

Nikko 12 - let’s pick a Jackson 5 song while Michael’s on trial for “alleged” *cough cough* child molestation. that’s all i could think about the whole song. Michael Jackson. Neverland. that funny Eminem stunt where he dressed like Michael Jackson and kicked his nose around the floor. i’d much rather be thinking “doesn’t want to ride dad’s coattails”. thank you, Simon, i thought maybe i was watching a different show from everyone else.

so Frank and i watch a lot of tv, even more since he finally got a DVR. i’d like to take this moment to pay homage to the DVR….

…

…

now. i figured y’all might want to know, or maybe i just want to tell y’all, what’s on the DVR list. and why.

Sunday

The Simpsons ’cause it’s funny. of course, they’ve gotten all political lately and really annoyed me, but they made up for it with last night’s epi.

King of the Hill Frank had this one on the list, and i was never much of a fan, but we both laugh a lot at it, so it must be because it’s funny.

Boston Legal Denny Crane. Alan Shore. Denny Crane. Alan Shore. and occasionally, Donny Crane. Denny Crane. Donny Crane. Denny Crane. Alan Shore. need i say more?

Malcolm in the Middle original. devious. funny. honest.

Arrested Development sick. funny. sick. quirky. and funny.

Monday

24. um.. do i really need a reason here? we all know it’s one of the most gripping, exciting shows on tv.

CSI Miami.

HORATIO: and that [puts sunglasses on] is what we’re going to find out.
CALLIE [thick southern accent]: that’s right. i’m Callie Duchesne, and i’m going to perform a little experiment of my own. [pulls out firearm]
RYAN: i’m Ryan. i’m cute. and OCD. and irresistible.
CORONER: oh… Baby, what did they do to you? you just come on back to the lab with me and tell me all about it.
HORATIO: oh, don’t worry. [takes sunglasses off] she will.

Tuesday

Scrubs. best sitcom.

House. we love Dr. House. he’s so mean.

American Idol. self-explanatory, really. it’s faaaaabulous! plus, i like Simon.

Wednesday

LOST um… JJ Abrams… Matthew Fox… Lili whatsername… everyone else on the island… plot… everything…

ALIAS welcome to “mountaineer” musings… any other questions? see my categories…

CSI New York Gary Sinise… Marine… that guy from Miracle…

The Simple Life: Interns this is a new addition. these girls are so dumb they’re hilarious. a guilty pleasure.

That ’70s Show it’s funny.

AI results show we like it when Ryan throws water on Simon.

Thursday

Joeyit is funny, i don’t care who ya are. the physics science geek student nephew reminds me so much of Frank. :-) glee! and it’s just funny.

CSI Vegas we are suckers for all CSIs. i heart Warrick Brown.

ER that one’s strictly for me. i like to be depressed.

Friday

Numbers very good show. for real.

Misc

The Shield Frank. reruns.
Smallville Frank. never gets watched, because it only records for a half hour and the other half gets cut off.

and there you have it. that’s our DVR list.

previously on “Hell on Wheels”

after our stressful day of driving through Louisiana, we stayed in Mississippi, but as a reader pointed out, i forgot that fact and skipped right over Mississippi in our story.

anyway, that’s where we stayed and checked email.

Chapter 27 - SarahK Pukes

Monday morning — this being our fourth day of travel, in case you’re not properly picturing the extent to which we were beaten down — i was not looking forward to driving through the tunnel that goes under the ocean; i couldn’t remember where along I-10 the tunnel is, so i was hoping that we had just happened to avoid it in our little detour and was trying not to think about it. so i checked my email. what did i have but an email from spacemonkey telling me that i would go under the ocean at Mobile. Frank came out of the bathroom and i kissed him and said hey. then i went into the bathroom and threw up just a little. Frank thought it was because I kissed him, but I knew it was because spacemonkey had reminded me of the tunnel. nice monkey.

Chapter 35 - The Best Stalking by a Blogger of Two Other Bloggers in the History of Blogs and Blogging and Bloggers

when spacemonkey had emailed me, he’d said that he could meet us near the puke tunnel for lunch while we were on our way through. i’d replied thanks but no thanks, because we just didn’t have time for anymore long stops. but if you happen to see a 24-foot U-Haul towing an SUV, wave to us.

so we gassed up the big clunker and loaded up on junk food for breakfast. the Bebe was either riding the back of the seat (she liked to perch up there and watch now) or she was nestled inside my fleece Grand Canyon jacket between Mommy and that crazy man in the cowboy hat. music: Toby Keith’s Greatest Hits Vol. 2, our favorite CD on the trip.

we got on the highway and headed into Alabama, picking our feet up as we crossed the Mississippi-Alabama state line. i was driving, and Frank was drinking his coffee. have i mentioned how completely deadheaded this man is before he has his coffee? no lie. we got to Mobile around lunchtime, and my shoulders started tensing up. Frank had talked to his parents and updated them on his injury, Minerva was acting like a cat again, and on the trip to Mobile, all was not so bad. day wudn’over yet, though.

so we were driving down I-10, and i noticed in the passenger-side mirrors that there was a car next to us (which i mistook for a minivan) that was getting awful close to us. then i heard honking. “sweetie, is that car really close to us?”

“uh, no, i don’t think so, sweetie.”
“no, really, i hear honking. is she honking at us?” (i assumed minivan = soccer mom)

Frank looked again and said, “weird, the guy’s smiling at us…. oh!! he has a sign!! it says “sarahk and Frank J. — hey from spacemonkey!”

i was cracking up, laughing my everloving pinkytoe off. Frank was laughing, spacemonkey was honking, and Minerva was meowing and looking around like, “um, you’re disturbing my nap??” Frank rolled down his window.

then i heard spacemonkey yelling. “the tunnel’s coming up!! the tunnel’s coming up!!”

i could not stop laughing. soon after i heard him yelling, we were splitting off in the lanes to go to the tunnel, and he was forced onto a different part of the highway. Frank and i laughed all the way through the tunnel, and we were halfway across a foggy, scary bridge before i realized we were on a foggy, scary bridge across the ocean. but i was distracted by this stalking event, so it was ok. and at that point, i didn’t even know that spacemonkey had almost gotten himself killed stalking us, or i’da laughed all the way to the other side of the bridge. ;-)

so then i remembered that once a blogger sends me his/her phone #, i almost always program it in my own cell phone, and spacemonkey had sent me his phone # when he said he could have lunch with us. so i handed Frank my cell phone and told him to call spacemonkey. he didn’t answer, but eventually, he called back.

i was still laughing as Frank gave spacemonkey his props for the best stalking ever.

so my hours should be better this week, back to 50s until April 15. i may get them all in during the week, so Frank and i can have a whole weekend this coming weekend. we haven’t decided what we’re going to do yet, but we want to do something new.

there’s so much around Florida neither of us has seen, and after we explore Florida, we have surrounding states to explore. so we don’t know what it will be this weekend, but something fun and blogworthy (of course!).

we’re also planning the next big IMAO teambuilding adventure for this summer. and by “team”, i mean “Frank J.” and “SarahK”, not the rest of the team. :-) y’all should help out with ideas. i’m thinking national parks-related so we can hike. so y’all think up good hiking places for us.

we’re going to see Dave Matthews Band this summer, I’ve already pre-ordered the tickets. fan club members get to do that, and hopefully, we get better seats than commoners who aren’t in the fan club. and i haven’t told her yet, but i’m thinking we’re going to invite ourselves to another blogger’s house for that weekend.

Bikermommy and Pappy are coming to visit this summer.

for fans of the “Hell on Wheels” series, there will be a new chapter or two up tonight. for fans of the ALIAS stuff, i should have a new episode up tomorrow night. for fans of our shooting adventures, i’ll post the range report over at IMAO either tomorrow morning or Wednesday morning. for fans of the Bad Example F&F Reunion series, look for more on that later this week. i’m not sure how to proceed with that one; do a person at a time like Harvey did, or a play-by-play? i think i’m better with pbps.

ok, back to work.

heart y’all!

dinner Friday night was good. before dinner, i went shopping with Marci from work and got some new jeans and a couple of tops. when i arrived the kid we saw at the shooting range recently who i thought worked at our Publix — turns out he works with Frank. and all the engineers are nice. and no one tried to teach me to carry the one or anything. of course, the first thing i said to the waitress was, “we’re going to need separate checks.” :-)

i worked yesterday, then after work i decided to pay my rent for March. so i made jambalaya for my sweetie, and for dessert i made Dave’s Molten Chocolate Cakes. while i was cooking, i tasted the batter and told Frank that if i ever leave him for anyone, it will be for a spoon full of chocolate. when the cakes were done, i told Frank he had to pause his jambalaya eating, because the cakes are supposed to be served immediately. our cake plates were completely cleaned, my goodness it was fabulous. i actually don’t have the words to describe how wonderful.

we went to church this morning, and the sermon was a good one, about prayer. i woke with a migraine which got progressively worse until i came home from church and took a long long nap. it’s a little better now. you know what i think will help me feel better?

there’s a leftover chocolate cake in the fridge. and i proclaim it will be amazing.

i’m having leftover chicken tikke masala for lunch, which reminds me, Frank, d0n’t eat meat today. speaking of meat, north of Melbourne is this work farm for the county sheriff. they have cows.

and 2 water buffalo. speaking of buffalo, i like buffalo wings, but only the really spicy ones. not deadly spicy like the atomic wings at Wing Stop, but good spicy like the cajun wings at Wing Stop. i miss Wing Stop.

i was at a stoplight the other day, and i was singing at the top of my lungs (yay Toby Keith and Krystal and “Mockingbird”), and i could tell the person in the vehicle next to mine was watching. i love doing that. sometimes i look over at them and make a point of “i’m singing my heart out over here, because i’m a freak”. other times i prefer to just let them gawk and pretend i don’t know they’re watching. i’m always afraid that if it’s a guy, they’ll think i’m flirting if i look. there’s only one man i flirt with these days.

speaking of days, i used to watch Days of our Lives when i was growing up. that show has jump0ed the shark so many times that i think they just keep the actors on scaffolds above the shark tank and tell them to jump up and down before each taping. ok, that was lame. i apologize.

you know what else is lame? the coke machine at work has 3 slots for diet coke, 1 slot for sprite, 1 slot for sugary caffeiny coke. and the real coke is empty more often than not. this makes for a very stressed, grumpy SarahK. my coworkers can attest.

speaking of attest, i’m an auditor (we attest stuff), and a CPA. tonight we have dinner with the people from Frank’s work again. i’m gonna walk in there with a big stamp on my forehead that says “CPA - can add”. or maybe i’m just going to be sweet and remind myself that it’s not their fault that they have no social skills. they were born that way. wow, i’m in an ugly mood. think i’ll run to the store for more cokes.

ta, have a lovely day, musees!

CrankyBeach caught the screen cap of my 200,000th hit, so she gets a prize in a few months. yay!!!!

y’all go say hi to CrankyBeach. she’s really nicer than her name makes her out to be. :-)

UPDATE: y’all go say hi to my first-born blogdaughter Angela, too, who also was the 200,000th visitor. this happened last time, too, where 2 people won, and yay!! i hope shipping charges to Guam aren’t bad. ;-) so bebe, you expect your prize sometime before you return to the states. :-D

ALIAS notes (spoilers if you’ve not watched)… ok, so Sydney and Dixon are meeting like Sydney and Vaughn used to… and i’m fanning myself because that looks an awful lot like the old warehouse… and they’re conspiring to fool Sloane… wheeeeee!!!!!

sitemeter schmitemeter… 15 more hits…

i heart y’all. y’all are the cutest and the sweetest and i heart y’all the best… except for Frank, i heart him bester than y’all.

i might be tired… and they might be giants… and giants might be jolly and green… and green tomatoes are yummy… as was the strawberry ice cream i had tonight… and tonight i am happy because i’m snuggling with my sweetie… sweet tarts are sweet… and tarty…

hmm. nighty night, musees.

i’m not a great blogger (’specially lately) but y’all keep coming back anyway.

the sitemeter looks to pass 200,000 hits today since i moved to the new digs on August 9. that’s exactly 7 months ago. exactly 3 months ago, i hit 100,000 after exactly 4 months (oh yeah, i still haven’t sent jonag her cracker jack prize). what’s my point? it’s so cool that it keeps happening on the 9th, as 9 is my 2nd favorite number. maybe it’s the hockey gods torturing me, because Mikey Modano is #9 and there’s no stinking hockey this year.

if you’re the lucky 200,000th visitor, and you get a screen cap of the sitemeter saying so, you just might win cracker jack prize #2, which will come in about 3 or 4 months.

busy week at work, musees (let’s say it together, “March 15th”), so i won’t be around much, but i’ll post when i can.

ta!

ever since Nicole ran away, i’ve been able to play favorites and tell the truth about my love for Minerva. and i always tell her, “you’re the sweetest! and the cutest! and i love you the best!” and then i kiss her all over her face and hold her close while she purrs until she decides that’s enough love and she wants to get down.

so Frank and i have taken to saying that to each other. we’ll start with any part, actually. “you’re the cutest!” for example.

the other one comes in with “and the sweetest!” and then together we, the corny goo-goo eyed lovebirds, say “and i love you the best!”

gag me with a spoon, it’s so stinking sweet.

Ryan Seacrest says it’s Tuesday. thanks, Ryan.

i really like Simon. be good, indeed.

Amanda 01 - i don’t know how she made it past last week. having said that, tonight was the first night i actually thought she did a good job. still not great, but the best she’d done, in my opinion. and i do love her outfit, i would love to find that corset top thingy and get one of my own. oh my goodness, did she just compare the “American Idol bonding experience” to the way soldiers bond in a war? pretty face. dumb head.

Janay 02 - wow, she looks adorable tonight. i love her hair like that. the singing? not so good. btw, if you’re wondering why she doesn’t look so ridiculously frightened tonight, it’s because she didn’t wear the freaky grey contacts.

Carrie 03 - that was her best in weeks. and yes, i’ll be voting her through. and LOL, Simon said she looks old fashioned tonight, but i was thinking, “wow, that blouse isn’t as modest as she usually dresses. boo.”

btw, this Zodiac thing they’re doing this week is totally beating me down. but then again, i’m a crabby Cancer.

Vonzell 04 - that was very brave of her to do that song, yet she seemed so confident up there, was pretty solid. she’s so precious, i just love her personality. i was a little bored because she didn’t stretch at all, but i really like her. and LOL, “luh-sooh”. um, lasso.

Nadia 05 - she’s always the most entertaining. a real star performer. and yes, this was her absolute best. and oh wow, her arms are awesome.

Lindsay 06 - she was so much better, her voice was great. oh how i hate the wavy capri pants, i could not possibly tell you how much. they look like skirts, but they’re capris… one word comes to mind. skorts. kill me.

Mikalah 07 - this started out so so shaky. the last three notes were outstanding after an incredibly boring song. but i cannot pull myself away when she’s performing, and that’s gotta mean something. and no, it’s not the trainwreck factor, because she is so stunning to look at, and i’m always wondering what she’s going to do next.

Jessica 08 - hey, Jessica, i can’t see enough of your boobs. perhaps if you take off your bra, i can catch a glimpse of your nipples. goodness, girl, reign yourself in. it was a good performance, but i just can’t get over the boobs.

ok, in order:

1. Nadia
2. Boobs
3. Vonzell
4. Carrie
5. Lindsay
6. Mikalah
7. Amanda
8. Janay

i think Janay and Lindsay are going home, but i think Amanda and Janay should go home.