note to men:

do not approach a woman at a gas station to ask for directions. especially if there are other men there that you can ask. and the second you start leaning out of your car window to ask this woman directions, if she’s in her car with the doors closed and locked before you can say, “excuse me miss”, don’t pull your car up in line with hers and say, “i think the lady inside gave me the wrong directions. i was asking you if you know where such-n-such intersection is.”

then, if she reaches for something in her car, don’t ask her if there’s a grocery store anywhere nearby, particularly if there is a Publix right across the street. and when she says, “there’s a Publix right there,” don’t say, “yeah, i know” and drive off in a huff.

and you’d better make sure you drive right into that Publix parking lot, park your car, go inside and buy something, because if you don’t, she’s at the nearest police station with all of the information about your car faster than the bullets from her favorite gun can hit the center of the paper target at her favorite shooting range.

seriously guys, don’t be idiots, and try to be a little considerate.

32 Responses to note to men:

  1. Who stops and asks for directions?

  2. Dave in Texas

    Really. I don’t. If I don’t know where it is, either I discover it or I don’t go there.

    Dude’s lucky to be alive this morning.

  3. The store?
    Well, it’s about 7 rounds north, at 1911 Colt Avenue.
    I can get you there at the rate of about 850 feet per second.

    Hope the cops give him what-for.

  4. I’m going to assume this guy was just clueless and stupid not up to something nefarious. But you did well to be safe.

  5. You done good, SarahK!

    I usually drive around until I find what I’m looking for. But, hey. I’m a guy.

    Jack.

  6. Sarah, Luke is absolutely right. None of this every should have happened, because no self-respecting man ever asks directions—particulary not from a woman.

    You see, that’s like giving that woman fuel to go home and say to her husband “you told me men don’t ask for directions. But a guy today asked for directions, so why can’t you?”

    Jack and Dave in Texas also seem to understand this.

  7. Wow. For someone who likes to talk about how southern she is, you’re kind of inhospitable, don’t you think?

    If you were sitting in your car with the doors locked, what would have been the harm in giving him directions, even if he might have been just trying to flirt with you by getting them?

    And oh by the way, there’s a difference between being responsible and being trigger-happy.

  8. first of all, kathryn, welcome to mountaineer musings. i hope you enjoy your stay.

    second of all, kathryn, my driver’s side window doesn’t roll down, so in order for me to give him directions, i have to have my door open, leaving me exposed.

    third of all, kathryn, i wasn’t in my car when he first approached. i was at the pump. his first words to me were, “not to mess you up or anything…” and what in the world does that mean? after i was back in my car, i opened the door (exposing myself) to help him, and his first words came out with him scowling at me. “i was asking you…” as if i was obligated to help him.

    third of all, kathryn, he asked me if there was a grocery store between the gas station and his destination. the gas store is directly across the intersection from a grocery store, which he could see if he opened his eyes. when i pointed at the grocery store and said, “there’s a Publix right there”, he said, “yeah, i know”, scowled again, and drove off. that’s just weird to ask for a grocery store when you already know it’s there.

    fourth of all, kathryn, you don’t know me. all you know is that i’m not Catholic. you apparently don’t know that i left my ex-husband in the middle of the night because i wasn’t sure he wouldn’t try to kill me if he knew i was leaving and that he’s a very very proud man who abhors me for letting people know that i left him because he’s a cheating scumbag and that always, for the rest of my life, i will wonder if that person sitting in that unmarked car over there was hired by him to kill me, and what are my escape routes, and where’s my weapon in case i need it.

    i don’t care if you think it’s inhospitable for me to not give him directions (which i did). something wasn’t right about the situation or about him, from the moment he started talking to me. if i were trigger happy i would have shot him.

    oh, and by the way, kathryn, there’s a difference between being hospitable and being stupid.

    have a nice day.

  9. Wealth Is A Ghetto

    Indeed rather than engage in social interaction with other people it is always best to rely on your weapons or police to do it for you. People are problems, all of them. Go home, lock your doors, burn your books, and definitely never leave your room. The best thing to do is to avoid people at all costs, raising the hostility level towards others is an invaluable tactic to alluding those menacing humans, and it sure does wonders for societal problems as a whole. Bravo!

    Seriously, what kind of a lunatic calls the cops on someone? I agree with kathryn, definitely inhospitable. Beyond courtesy though it’s unconscionable , and morally deficient. The police are the worst kind of class traitors, handmaidens of the rich . I don’t know much about southern but where I come from there are the elite, who maintain systems to protect their privilege, and the people, the rest of us. If you aren’t part of the elite, don’t use their systems to oppress your fellows; if you are part of the elite, then I wish you a life of disharmony and strife, God knows that’s what they’ve given us. Ever heard the saying “if government is the answer, it was a stupid question”? Yeah, well it applies here.

    I hope in future ventures outside the safety of your home, you are able to evade any unnecessary human interaction.

  10. Sorry you’re so oppressed there, wealth. I don’t see where you have any claim to attack SarahK, though. She recognized a potentially dangerous situation and acted in an appropriate way. Watch the news every day, and you’ll see some pretty good reasons to not trust random people on the street, especially if you’re a woman by yourself, and if the guy’s acting suspiciously. She never said what ‘class’ the guy appeared to be in, probably because she didn’t have deep rooted prejudices against certain groups of people just because of how much money they have. Unlike you, apparently.

    Your ignorant rant against the wealthy and the police illustrates why SarahK shouldn’t bother taking you seriously. I’m friends with quite a few cops here in my hometown – I’ve noticed that most of the people who hate the cops are the ones doing drugs and engaging in other such illegal activities. I’m certainly not anywhere close to being in this ‘elite’ class you talk about, but I’m smart enough to know how valuable having a police force is. I’m also smart enough to know, like SarahK, that the police aren’t always there, which is why we carry guns.
    If you want to get rid of the police, get rid of crime, first. Otherwise you’re either a fool or a criminal.

  11. hi, i’m new (been reading this blog via imao) – just in response to some of the criticism here for sarahk calling the police on people acting suspiciously:

    1. give the poor woman a break; she’s not 18 and she’s had some life experience. her original post may not have properly captured the details (as her subsequent comment, which filled in a lot of same, showed), but i’m sure she has good situational awareness skills. sorry, but unusual behavior by an unknown party at a gas station IS suspicious.

    2. the police are ROUTINELY contacted by citizens reporting unusual behavior. if you read the police blotter in any newspaper you’ll see a pile of “suspicious person” calls. many times they turn out to be nothing; but sometimes they turn out to be drunks etc. (who COULD pose a security risk) or real criminals (who pose a serious danger). it sounds like the guy sarahk encountered was most likely in an irritable mood and was inarticulate (perhaps he was looking for an Albertsons and not a Publix, but didn’t articulate that), but otherwise harmless. but his behavior was somewhat over the top. I’ve been approached at gas stations by both men and women asking for directions, and I can say they’re usually respectful and also DO NOT APPROACH ME. they stay next to their cars and talk to me from a distance.

    so, cut the poor girl some slack. and ciao!

  12. Wealth Is A Ghetto

    Ok, you can call me ignorant it that doesn’t make it true, nor does it invalidate what I said.

    Yeah, I’m prejudiced against the rich because they are the origin of the struggle which many people on this planet face. Perhaps you’ve never worked, or lived a life bereft of necessities because cost of living is over three times what you make. Well, whatever, I have. Defend the rich as you will but everyone I know is working class and their wages are robbed of them by employers who don’t work and buy themselves yachts. Hey, maybe it’s not really “pre”-judicial to dislike or distrust people for the real burdens that they lay on the shoulders of my peers and I. If you think I’m wrong then state your argument don’t just call me names.

    As to being a criminal fine, if you have to cower behind laws that you weren’t allowed a hand in making and then assume that it’s bad to break them, then you have no room to call me on prejudicial issues. Just about everyone in history that I have respect for was considered a criminal by one state or another, but according to your prejudice that would make their contributions to humanity invalid. The struggles of all people seeking to broaden their liberties involved breaking unjust laws. As Voltaire said, “It is dangerous to be right, in matters on which the established authorities are wrong”, but I suppose you assume that Spartacus, Jesus Christ, Gandhi, Nelson Mandela, Rosa Parks, Harriet Tubman, and every revolutionary in every revolution are just horrible, unscrupulous people that the world would be better without? Criminal? I guess we criminals keep good company. Meanwhile the real criminals rob food from the mouths of starving children worldwide, and their lackeys, the police, protect their criminal enterprises. There really is no gang like government.

    Yeah, maybe I don’t do drugs, but I have no compunction against taking back from the rich if it means feeding, heating, clothing or housing a family member or friend. And what of people who want to blow their own bodies and minds away? Who are you and your class traitor friends to tell them that their chosen escape from their misery and poverty should end them up in an earthly hell for the poor? Yeah, lock all the poor up they might try to exist with dignity. It was Thoreau who said “Under a government which imprisons any unjustly, the true place for a just man is in prison” a statement with which I wholly concur and would hold my head high were I imprisoned for a crime against the elite, as I would urge any to do.

    Am I a fool? Yeah, maybe, but at least I know where my interests lie. You have to hand it to the rich, it’s rare that they argue over morality in their exploitation of the working class, but here we are arguing over the disposition of the rich. What a shame.

    As to SarahKs reaction to that guy, I stand by what I said, being hostile is ridiculous unless you know that a person has ill intentions toward you. Or you can keep frying your brain with what the nonsense that the media is feeding you and remain scared of the entire planet. Your life, do as you please, but if you do something stupid expect ridicule. By all means though, do take what I say with a grain of salt, I’d hope you’d scrutinize what all people have to say, but if your going to refute my words do so with a modicum of reason.

    I’m fine with cutting people slack, but sorry I don’t see calling the police as good situational awareness. If you carry a gun, great, then have faith in that, and yourself, or just don’t talk to people. Either way the cops aren’t going to do anything of value. Unless you specifically wish harm on that person, cut them some slack and leave the state out of the issue. It’s not a crime to be socially inept, and people that treat it as if it were are the true social problem. As to the cops, well they are bad all around as far as I’m concerned, and calling them on someone is a grievous social offense unless you explicitly know that said person is a threat to you or the community, and you can see no other way of handling the circumstance.

  13. you go Patriot Xeno and JW! That’s my daughter and I want her to pay attention and be cautious of suspicious behavior. It could save her life…ever heard of Amber Haggerman? That child was abducted while walking to school. The same school my daughter walked to. So shut up Wealth is a Ghetto and Kathryn…you don’t know what you are talking about. Hope you get this message…unless of course some stalker has already duped you into a dark alley.

  14. Better safe than sorry Sarah. 7 years ago, i was shot at while driving, but missed fortunately. the bullet went through my driver side window and out the passenger window. Radom drive-by on a business trip about 2 hours from home. Took the police 45 minutes to respond, and it was over a week before all the details were taken. Since then, I always carry a pistol in my vehicle. I’m not trigger happy either, unless someone starts spouting off anarchist BS.

  15. Wealth is a Ghetto:
    You said you have no compunction “taking back from the rich” – please explain that.

    Has some wealthy person you know actually come and taken your property away from you? Or do you simply assume that because they are wealthier than you, they must have gotten it through illegitimate means.

    Here’s a clue: Robin Hood was not stealing from the rich to give to the poor, no matter how much the left tries to spin it that way. HE WAS STEALING FROM THE GOVERNMENT TO GIVE BACK TO THE TAXPAYERS!

    Seriously, lay off the Kool-Aid.

  16. I would just like to state for the record that Xeno and Grim rock.

  17. sarahk, it must be nice to be rich. ;D

  18. Wealth Is A Ghetto

    Well, Citizen Grim, as I already mentioned what is mine by all natural right, that is what I produce and therefore earned, is taken by bosses who do not work and yet reap great bounty. So if I and my co-workers do everything to maintain an enterprise, then through what legitimate means could one who has invested almost no time in the enterprise claim the lion’s share of it?

    Then there are those whom I am compelled to purchase from should I choose to subsist, which as yet, I still do. Really these are one in the same, the bosses and the merchants, they extort money from me by over charging, sure the market will bear this price for one of exceeding wealth, but then there are the rest of us who eek out existences because the ludicrous prices, that the rich feel entitled to, drain our wages before all needs are met.

    So yes, I have been taken from, but not by some wealthy person rather a very large group of wealthy people and it is from those very people that I will take back.

    I don’t know how Robin Hood came into all this, but honestly I have no issue with your version, except that you seem to allude to a dichotomy between state and capital, which, while some separation between the two is arguable in our time, in the time of Robin Hood there was no distinction to be made. In the feudal system the rich were the government, the land owners or lords, were paid by the peasants living on their land, who then paid homage to a baron, who paid a count or earl, who paid a duke or marquis who then paid the king. So to say that he stole from the state, but not the rich would be like saying that if I feed a spaniel some bacon that I am feeding a canine some pig, rather than a dog some pork. This is the half-full or half-empty argument you seem to be perceiving a difference which in reality does not exist.

    Now, if your paradigm allows you to avoid paying taxes and to steal from the state then I’d encourage that, I try to work under the table, and buy over the internet, or black market, as much as possible to avoid paying the state and would of course encourage all to do likewise. Of course it may offend Xeno’s class traitor cop friends if you do.

  19. Wealth, whose money is invested in this business that steals all your money? the people who take the lion’s share also risked the lion’s share. it’s their money, their risk. if you run their business into the ground by being a communist, who loses their retirement? you? no.

    and how is it that your bosses steal your money that you earn? they take it in payroll deductions for social security and medicare? just curious, because if that’s the case, then that is the government stealing your money to pay for socialism. yeah, i hate paying for people who won’t work, too. especially when the government is stealing my hard-earned rich people snob money that i could use to pay for more gold boullion to plate the roof of my house with.

    and if you don’t want to spend so much money on your purchases, buy generic. even rich snobs like me do that from time to time. (you know, when the rich people brands are all sold out because all of my rich snob friends bought them before i could get to the rich snob store.)

  20. Sarah, you have way more patience than I would for the tripe I’ve seen in this thread!

    Good for you for looking out…not only for yourself, but for other women who might not have had the intelligence to be suspicious.

  21. sarahk! you should have told me the brand names were out! i’d send you some, poor girl, subsisting on generic things.

  22. Wealth Is A Ghetto

    Well, to be quite honest no one really knows who’s money it is that is invested in most businesses these days. You’d have to be rather unfamiliar with the relationship between states and markets to believe that the romanticized tale of a person who works hard for their money until they can purchase their own shop is common, or even relevant, today.

    In modern American markets businesses are from the start subsidized by the state, hence the reason that we can’t be sure of whose money is starting these businesses. However we can be relatively sure that most of it is derived from the workers, or as you refer to them the “taxpayers”(I find that to be a demeaning term that implies an individual’s value is derived from the state). Today more tax money is doled out to corporate welfare than is used to supplement income of the poor, or any element of social welfare.

    So let’s consider whose retirement is at risk. Clearly not mine nor my peers, no matter how long a working class person works they aren’t likely to be able to retire, so that option is forfeit already for us, regardless of how much or little we work, in that we are not members of the elite. However neither is the owner or boss likely slip in their financial standing, commonly the failing business will begin receiving corporate welfare if it continues to falter and the worker’s tax money will be rerouted into the businesses they built and the bosses derailed.

    In the instance that even collusion with the state cannot save the business there is the matter of the ‘separate entity’ accounting principle, this allows for corporate heads to keep their finances separate from the business’s, thus in the instance of the business completely collapsing their bank accounts are untouchable, even if the business still owes the workers their paychecks. This pretty much ensures that as far as the owner is concerned all that is lost in a corporation is time, the money remains at their disposal, and they may feel free to start another failed adventure in leeching tax-money and exploiting the poor, or just retire.

    You seem to have some libertarian sensibility about you, however you fail to bring that philosophy to its inevitable conclusion. So I can’t really see what angle you have on these things. You seem to dislike paying the government, but only as it concerns those who are at the greatest disadvantage. Do you just hate the under-dog? I mean I can understand your not wanting to pay for the existence of those who refuse to work, I also believe in a concept of mutual aid which requires that those who desire services of the community provide what services they can to the community in return. However you seem to be bothered more by the notion you are contributing to those who subsist off the crumbs from the state, than those who loot the treasury. Which causes me to assume that you to espouse to one of a few bleak doctrines: you are simply a misanthrope who hates people, which considering your treatment this subjects topic seems feasible; you are a fascist, and I honestly don’t mean that in the inflammatory sense, but in the sense that Mussolini said “Fascism should more properly be called Corporatism as it is a merger of state and corporate power”; or, worse even still, you are an autocrat, an authoritarian by creed, who believes that the weak should suffer at the whim of those strong enough to crush them under heel.

    I’m hoping that you would not openly subscribe to any of those ideologies, but if not then your philosophy is inconsistent. If indeed you have libertarian orientation then you must apply that to all forms of authority or it is merely a ruse, a masquerade to obfuscate the inevitable truth of your philosophy, and nothing benevolent is derived from those paths.

  23. wealth, your diatribes are now boring me (as before). your next lengthy comment will be edited to something much shorter and much less craaaaaazy.

  24. You did 2 “third of alls” sarah… :)

    I won’t even touch any of this other stuff… just, you remember that email about the people? Yeah… ;)

  25. Dave in Texas

    Two quick points.

    1. nothing wrong with how sarahk dealt with idiot/predator. As mentioned before, she knows how to kill, and he’s lucky he didn’t push it.

    2. don’t feed trolls.

    3. ok, more than one point. why is it that morons who drop by to vomit their disdain cannot express themselves clearly in less than 1000 words?

    just curious. personally I think it’s because they just love the sound of their own voices.

  26. Wealth Is A Ghetto

    Well, we clearly consider each other crazy. I probably consider you farther from reality than you believe me to be, partly because you maintain such distinct contradictions and don’t seem to have a keen grasp on your own philosophy. Mostly, however, because you appear to support some forms of oppression without any clear reason.

    To be fair SarahK, if you want simple and interesting answers, you mustn’t ask dull and complex questions.

  27. Sorry about the troll, Sarah. :(

  28. Pingback: Boudicca's Voice

  29. All I have to say…

    ALWAYS trust your GUT!!

  30. Wealth is a Ghetto has no class, you my dear, are swimming in it! I’m with Sissy, trust your gut!

  31. LOL – Sarah, I’ve been so busy I got way behind in my blog reading. Then I saw at Bou’s that you had a troll…. I had to come by and see it for myself. Wow – it has a LOT to say doesn’t it… it should get it’s own blog and not hijack yours. *grin*

    BTW – good weapon to have on hand… when you get out of your car to pump gas – take your keys with you. Then your car can’t be jacked too easily and if someone gets too close – you can use the keys on ‘em. Take care!

    Oh yeah… to the troll… I’m one of those snobby rich people who only works about 16 hours a day. I know that’s not nearly as many as you work… but hey… some of us are just the slothful idle rich y’know.

  32. Interesting discussion, but I just wanted to comment on the original post. I’ll confess; I’m a guy who has asked for directions. I have a subconscious distrust of directions and as a result I tend to get lost, and therefore have to stop and ask for help (I usually end up being told the original directions, again.) However, I have managed to obtain the afore-mentioned help without coming off as some weirdo by stopping at gas stations or small stores, and going inside to ask the cashier and any customers who might be standing around. That way, I end up (usually) with good instructions, and there’s no one fumbling for a gun as I walk up to them in their car. As for the trolls, just remember, they’re a sign of popularity. Mountaineermusings is coming of age!