*I’m trying not to like Kobe. He’s making it really hard on me, because he’s all patriotic and proud to play for his country, speaks at least three languages, and cracks me up. I’m still succeeding in not liking him, but just barely. Well played, Bryant.

*Bob Costas just interviewed Michael Phelps and his mom, Debbie. Classy guy, great mom, I just love them to pieces.

*The male commentator from the rowing events sounds like Alan Colmes. I told Frank this, and he (playing his DS and only listening to the TV) said, “Oh, I thought that’s who it was.” WAY TO GO USA WOMEN’S ROWING EIGHT! And I thank you, from the bottom of my heart, for singing along to the national anthem! I love it, they were practically screaming the anthem!

*Oh, earlier I was watching the women’s 100M (track) heats (or maybe it was 100M hurdles, I don’t remember), and there was an American girl who came in second in her race. Her weave was, I’m not kidding, almost to her waist. I think she might have gotten first in her heat if she wasn’t carrying around so much weight on her head.

*My hat is off to Guo JingJing. I mean, if I wore hats. Unless I’m hanging out in the desert sun all day, I generally don’t wear hats. I would wear bonnets if they were still in vogue. Maybe I need to move to southern Utah or northern Arizona.

*Men’s floor exercise final. The Russian guy was just fantastic. 15.725, great score, deserved score (good job, judges! Those flash cards are helping your subtraction skills!). The Brazilian gymnast — he needs a year’s subscription to the SarahK Cheering Up Pie Club. I actually cried for him when he walked off crying.

*Lauryn Williams looks and talks just like my friend Kisha from Florida. I love Lauryn’s dog, but I wonder why his eyes are so bloodshot. She should check his crate for drugs. I also love her explanation for why she has a Great Dane. “When I was growing up, I always had this impression that wealthy people all have butlers and Great Danes. So I consider this a high-class dog.”

*Alicia Sacromone’s interview was nice. And I’m glad to see her first vault was great. Second is good. 15.537 is her average. Cheng Fei lands on her knees on her vault and is still ahead of Alicia. WHATEVS. I take back what I said about the improvement of the judges. I have to admit, I’m happy for the Russiouzbekigerman 33-year-old who just took the lead in the vault. Oksana Chusovitina. But now after the next vaulter, Alicia is out of the medals. That’s too bad for her. And wow, Oksana has a silver medal! I’m really happy for her. North Korea has a gold medal, and I’m sure the North Korean girl is just amazed and thrilled to have seen electricity for the first time in her life. Ouch, Alicia is out of the medals by hundredths of a point, beat out for bronze by Lands-On-Her-Knees Cheng. Oh yay! Bela is on with Bob again. He will agree with me. “It was a REEPUFF, BAB. A REEPUFF.” He is incensed.

*I am holding my breath here. My boyfriend Sasha (he’s no longer my new boyfriend, as we’ve been seeing each other for over a week now) is on the pommel horse. Should have held by breath longer, as he fell off the horse. Returned to fabulousness when he got back on with that high-flying helicopter thingy, but it’s not enough. He scores under 15, and I need to pinch and kiss his little RussioAmerican cheeks (the face ones) to make it all better for him. But I’m pretty sure he’s just thrilled to even be in Beijing. Wow, the Croatian got the silver (first gymnastics medal ever for Croatia), and Great Britain holds on to bronze and keeps China to only one medal in this event!

*Nastia and the Beefy Peach (thanks, Tracey, even Frank knows them as that now) are on the floor routine. Shawn Johnson will go first, and Nastia will be seventh. Shawn nails her routine and gets a 15.5, the second-highest score for women’s floor routine all week. Jiang Yuyuan is third (the Russian who was second wasn’t even close to Shawn), and I’d just like to point out that this girl is totally underage. She’ll be close to Shawn, but she shouldn’t score higher, in my unprofessional and totally patriotic opinion. 15.35. Large sigh of relief from me. This Brazilian girl has so much energy! It’s too bad she went out of bounds twice, because I enjoyed her energy. But wow, how many Red Bulls did she have before she went on? I was getting the jitters just watching all that energy come out of her. Poor Anna Pavlova, today is just not her day. Cheng Fei just stumbled a bit on her standing twirly thingy, and wow, fell. She’s out of the medals. Shawn Johnson is guaranteed a medal. Nastia up next. She nails her routine too. And… Nastia has a 15.425! So it’s Shawn 1, Nastia 2. Sandra Izbasa is last to go, and she’s flawless. I don’t think as great as our top two, but she did go last, so she has an advantage. 15.65, she takes the gold right out of Shawn’s hands. Shawn gets silver, Nastia gets bronze, and China is shut out of the medals.

And that’s where I stop for tonight, because it’s bedtime.